the Really, How Can I Be So Awesome? Thread

[luke]

Looks like they got the job done last night.

[frag]

That's one sexy power drill.

[frag]

FRAG'S SLOW DESCENT INTO ALCOHOLISM - Night 2[/i][/b]

[luke]

You're on, bitch. I'm off tomorrow, done killed off a six pack of the light stuff, ate two Somas, now I'm moving on to Abita Turbo Dog.

[luke]

Actually, you're not on. I have stuff to do tomorrow. But you're semi-on.

That sounds dirty.

[frag]

How to write the greatest song ever written.
a step-by-step how-to by Frag

First, it's very important to keep in mind that all great songs come from the heart...from the soul. A great song is not just about technical ability or know-how. Those take a backseat to SOUL.
So, in order to keep it truly as a song from the soul, you need inspiration.
For all intents an purposes, the inspiration for the greatest song ever written is Rocky.

[frag]

We've got our muse. Now we need to prepare to write this blasted thing.

Step 1
Get a guitar


Now ask yourself, does it have six strings? Yes/No

If you answered Yes, proceed below. If No, stop now and go listen to Veronica Daggers, my young vixen protige.

Is the guitar in standard tuning? Yes/No

If Yes, then you're ready to go! If No, then...well, tune it up bitch.

[frag]

Step 2
Inspiration is a finicky bitch. You need to be prepared to document all ideas that come to mind. For this you will need a notebook and a writing utensil.
Be particular when choosing a writing utensil. For this project, I've chosen a slightly weathered Purple Crayon because...well, we're working with a song about Rocky here.

[frag]

Step 3
We will avoid any obnoxious finger-picking patterns and stick with simple strumming for this project. Not because we're lazy, but because we're bearing in mind our muse.
You will need a pick, a lighter and some smokes.

[frag]

Step 4
It's a good idea to have other works lying around, be they of the written word or of music itself. Keep your source of inspiration in mind!
That's why we also need some gay literature.

[frag]

Step 5
And last but certainly not least, you'll need some booze.
Unfortunately we've only got this to drink:

[luke]

I'm listening to the title track to this experiment, and debating whether I should put some New "Pornographers" on an album for a 13 year-old girl who my wife teaches.

[luke]

frag said:

How to write the greatest song ever written.
a step-by-step how-to by Frag

First, it's very important to keep in mind that all great songs come from the heart...from the soul. A great song is not just about technical ability or know-how. Those take a backseat to SOUL.
So, in order to keep it truly as a song from the soul, you need inspiration.
For all intents an purposes, the inspiration for the greatest song ever written is Rocky.

Was it Biggie? Or Puffy? Who said that they made all their proteges watch Rocky with them, for the inspiration.

[frag]

Step 6
Write down the first line that comes into your head.

It can be a statement of truth (as above) or it can simply be a metaphoric observation. Whatever the case, that's the line we're going to work around.

[Kensterberg]

luke said:

I'm listening to the title track to this experiment, and debating whether I should put some New "Pornographers" on an album for a 13 year-old girl who my wife teaches.

In this case, Luke, methinks discretion would probably be the better part of valor. Esp. if the 13 yr. old in question looks fairly, um, mature for her age.

Can't be too careful these days.