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Post by maarts on Feb 5, 2005 8:09:12 GMT -5
Runway hog
A dead hedgehog that created an airport mishap involving an Air France passenger plane nearly seven years ago has ended up costing the French Government more than €3 million ($5 million) in a court ruling this week.
In 1998, the hedgehog's carcass was lying at the end of a runway in Marseilles, with about 20 seagulls picking at it.
The plane's right engine sucked in the birds, destroying engine and flock, and forced the pilot to abort the take-off.
The court ruled the Government was responsible for keeping runways clear of such perils.
Just wondering if the relatives of those gulls ever sued Air France for neglicence...
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Post by maarts on Feb 5, 2005 8:12:59 GMT -5
Risque Doris Day
A devout Baptist couple have told of their disgust after they bought a classic musical DVD featuring Doris Day from their local supermarket only to discover it was an Italian porn film.
Alan and Anne Leigh-Browne, from Wellington, Somerset, England had been expecting to enjoy watching The Pajama Game, a romantic comedy featuring the fifties screen legend.
Instead the shocked pensioners were confronted by the raunchy sex film Tettore che Passione, which translates as Breasts of Passion.
Retired doctor Alan, 67, picked up the film, which was sealed in plastic wrapping, for £2.99 ($A7.29) from the bargain bin of a Safeway supermarket in nearby Taunton last Monday.
Yesterday, the couple settled down with a cup of tea to watch the 1957 film which has a U (universal) certificate.
"We are big fans of Doris Day and were looking forward to the film, but we knew something was amiss when a warning flashed up on the screen advising under 18s not to carry on watching," Mr Leigh-Browne said, "Then some topless young women appeared and started talking in Italian. We were horrified. It's not what you expect from a Doris Day film. It was a pretty raunchy, explicit film, it certainly pulled no punches. My wife and I were very shocked, but we watched it until the end because we couldn't believe what we were seeing. The film became progressively more graphic, there was no plot to it, it was just sex."
Alan and his wife Anne, 60, a retired teacher, complained to Safeway and all copies of the Pajama Game were immediately removed from the store.
I'll bet 50 bucks that Alan has that particular video now somewhere safely hidden in his cellar, waiting for his wife to go out for the afternoon without him....
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Post by maarts on Feb 5, 2005 8:17:22 GMT -5
Carving out a record
A group of Taiwan sculptors has carved an 8.5-metre wooden penis, hoping to set the world record for the longest sculpture of the male genital.
Eight sculptors in Pingtung, in southern Taiwan, spent half a year carving the wooden penis. Now their artwork - 8.5 metres long and weighing 12 tonnes - is on display at an amusement park in Pingtung, Taiwan Television Enterprise (TTV) reported.
The sculptors plan to apply to the Guinness Book of World Records to have their creation officially declared the longest in the world, TTV said.
"The Asian certification centre for the Guinness World Records said they have a category for wooden sculptures but the Guinness World Records Museum in London could reject the application if it considers the sculpture immoral," said Huang Chih-ying, from the Guinness World Records Asian certification centre in Taichung, central Taiwan.
What got me in this story is this- this thing is displayed in an amusement park?
Some amusement!
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Post by Philemon on Feb 5, 2005 10:47:58 GMT -5
My wife and I were very shocked,
but we watched it until the end
because we couldn't believe
what we were seeing.
Must be because that couple had so little sex in all their life
at first they had trouble recognize what the fuck
was happening between the *actors* on the TV screen ...
How long does it take normaly
to make the difference between a porno flick
and a 1957 Doris Day movie ... ??
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Post by maarts on Feb 5, 2005 16:59:45 GMT -5
For a Baptist?
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Post by Philemon on Feb 5, 2005 17:06:04 GMT -5
Aren't those the ones who never take their clothes off ... ?? Even for bathing, sleeping or making children ... HÉ maarts : You think that's too risquéand I might get in trouble again ... ?  ? |
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Post by maarts on Feb 5, 2005 17:20:18 GMT -5
I don't know much about Baptists,
only one who was named John
who allegedly had trouble finding baptising water during his stint as a minister
so he took his whole congregation into a river...
(or something like that).
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Post by maarts on Feb 5, 2005 17:26:29 GMT -5
You'll have just have to sit through this to the end, I suppose...
...but as far as I'm concerned, whomever objects can have a 8.5 meter, twelve tonne wooden penis inserted forcefully into their
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Post by maarts on Feb 11, 2005 6:46:28 GMT -5
Rugby fan 'cuts off testicles' to celebrate win
A Welsh rugby fan has reportedly cut off his own testicles to celebrate Wales beating England at rugby.
Geoff Huish, 26, was so convinced England would win Saturday's match he told fellow drinkers at a social club, "If Wales win I'll cut my balls off", the Daily Mirror reported today.
Friends at the club in Caerphilly, south Wales, thought he was joking.
But after the game Huish went home, severed his testicles with a knife, and walked 200 metres back to the bar with the testicles to show the shocked drinkers what he had done.
Huish was taken to hospital where he remained in a seriously ill condition, the paper said. Police told the paper he had a history of mental problems.
Wales's 11-9 victory over England at the Millennium Stadium in Cardiff was their first home win in 12 years.
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Post by ScottsyII on Feb 11, 2005 7:49:20 GMT -5
You are fucking kidding! That is insane ( and immensely excruciating!) I can't believe he took them to his mates in the pub to show it off... wouldn't he be like bleeding profusely from his crotch region... that is one amazingly bizarre story! Holy crap!
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Post by maarts on Feb 11, 2005 8:44:18 GMT -5
Cows must keep off the grass
Farmers in Liechtenstein will no longer be allowed to feed cannabis to their livestock under new rules to be introduced in the tiny Alpine state next month.
Hemp, of which the marijuana plant is a well-known variety,contains small amounts of THC, the active substance in hashish and marijuana, and traces of the drug have been filtering through to the milk of dairy cows fed with the plant.
The levels breach the maximum limit set by the new rules, which say that animal feed must be free of any component that could have an adverse effect on humans, the country's veterinary and food controls office said.
Hemp will also be banned from the diets of meat herds, although there is no clear evidence that THC can filter through into meat.
The rules are intended to bring Liechtenstein, a tiny nation of 33,000 inhabitants, in line with food standards in neighbouring Switzerland, with which it forms a customs union.
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Post by maarts on Feb 14, 2005 6:53:18 GMT -5
A T(oddler)-Plater
Michigan police apprehended a four-year-old boy driving his mother's car to a video shop in the middle of the night.
Although he was unable to reach the accelerator, the boy managed to drive to the store, 400 metres from his home, about 1.30am on Friday, police said.
Weaving and with its headlights off, the car attracted the attention of police when it struck two parked cars.
The boy put the vehicle in reverse and then struck the police car.
The mother told police she had previously let him steer from her lap. No charges will be filed against mother or son.
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Post by maarts on Feb 14, 2005 6:56:32 GMT -5
Farmer kanga-woos wife
A 49-year-old Estonian farmer has found a unique way to show the love of his life his enduring adoration for her: he's given her two kangaroos.
"I just thought my wife already has everything a woman can dream about - me, of course, and our three daughters, whom I gave her many years ago - so I decided to express my everlasting love to her with two wonderful Australian kangaroos," farmer Elmet Erik said just prior to Valentine's Day.
The two marsupials, who are a touch out-of-the-ordinary in northern Europe, appear to have acclimatised well to the nippy Estonian winter and can be seen daily hopping through the snow at the Eriks' farm on the island of Muhu.
Erik's wife Helena said the kangaroos are the crowning glory of her long and lasting love affair with Elmet. "I feel like a queen. How many women have kangaroos at home to remind them daily - not only on Valentine's Day - how nice life is with true love? People should create more romance around themselves to brighten their days," said Helena Erik, "I am happy that I have such an adoring husband. Estonian men are generally very conservative and Estonia is a rather patriarchal country, which I hope the younger generation will change."
The farmer and his 50-year-old wife fell in love 32 years ago and married a year later. "I think the recipe for a happy and lasting marriage is not difficult: you have to trust the other person and you need to have common interests," said Elmet Erik, "And you also have to ensure that the flame of your love keeps burning, because if it goes out, it's very hard to get that feeling back again," he added.
A dash of exoticism probably hasn't hurt the Eriks' enduring love affair either. The two kangaroos are not the only unusual animals at their home near the Baltic Sea. The Estonian couple also have a thriving ostrich farm, for which the idea was hatched on a romantic trip six years ago to celebrate their 25th wedding anniversary.
"In 1999, on that romantic journey, we visited a small farm at Abruka island near Estonia's biggest island, Saaremaa. It was the only ostrich farm at the time in Estonia, and we simply fell in love with the big-eyed birds - perhaps because we were in a very romantic mood," said the love-struck farmer. "We knew nothing about ostriches or whether we could make a profit raising them, but we decided to try," Erik said.
Today, the ostrich farm is the mainstay of the Eriks' living, and the doe-eyed birds have taught the couple a thing or two about love and jealousy.
"After years living with these huge, exotic birds, I think ostriches are a lot like humans, capable of very strong feelings, including fits of jealousy. A few years ago, we took one of the three 'wives' of one of the male ostriches away. When my wife went to feed the angry 'husband', he almost killed her, he was so angry that she had taken his bird-spouse from him. He eventually got all three wives back, but he has never forgiven my wife," Elmet Erik said.
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Post by ScottsyII on Feb 16, 2005 4:40:56 GMT -5
Hemp will also be banned from the diets of meat herds, although there is no clear evidence that THC can filter through into meat.
So this is what they mean by the meat being seasoned with various herbs!
And a four year old driving a car... I think I read somewhere the kid was getting down into the footwell to pump the accelerator and then climbing back up to turn the steering wheel... how hard would this kid have been working to keep the car moving in a basically forward direction... must have been some feat for a small kid!
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Post by Philemon on Feb 16, 2005 8:43:38 GMT -5
Must also be a kid who's never heard the word NO
even once in his short - SHORT ! - life ...
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