Post by luke on Apr 7, 2006 9:58:23 GMT -5
It's Friday, and it's been a slow week at work, so I'm in the mood to make a self-indulgent thread that won't get too many replies and will probably disappear pretty soon.
My wife is always telling me stories about some of her more fucked up students, and even more stories about some of her genuine favorites. Here are some of the wackier ones I get to hear about daily.
Hollister Boy
I don’t know the kid’s real name, but this is how she refers to him. He makes me wish I were 13 again so I could kick the ever-living shit out of him.
This kid, I think he’s pushing 15 in the seventh grade. Apparently, he wears Hollister clothing to school every day, and writes stuff on his desk like, “I Heart Hollister.” And he’s always talking in class about how much he loves Hollister. He wrote on his notebook, “Hollister Rules, Hot Topic Drools.” One day, he was in the hall at his locker, in a pink Hollister shirt, dancing and singing, “I’m going to Hollister this weekend/It’s my favorite store!”
My wife says he appears to be straight, but just a bit too daft to realize how gay he sounds.
Obviously, the other kids can’t stand this moron, and are always making snide comments at him. He asked my wife once if she “knew that store, Hot Topic.” She said, “Yeah,” and he said, “Do you like it?”, and she said, “Not really, but I got some shoes there once.” Then Hollister Boy gives her this grimace and turns the other way, so she goes, “It’s better than Hollister, though, that’s the worst store in the mall.”
Tate
Tate is this annoying kid, sorta semi-retarded but too annoying to feel bad for. He’s “that kid” in class who always asks the stupidest fucking questions, leading all the other kids to sigh and occasionally snap at him. For instance, my wife will go, “Does anyone have any questions related to the story we just read?” Tate will raise his hand, and she’ll repeat, “Does anyone have any questions related to the story we just read?” When he doesn’t take his hand down, she reluctantly calls on him, and he says something like, “Mrs. Logan, did you see NASCAR yesterday?” All to a big collective sigh.
A couple weeks ago the state held testing. After testing, the kids got to play softball. So the day before, my wife goes, “We’re playing softball tomorrow, so bring your gloves if you have any.” The next day, Tate shows up to the softball field with his fucking winter gloves, trying to catch fly balls in these poofy black leather insulated things, sweating his ass off in the 80 degree heat.
My wife is always telling me stories about some of her more fucked up students, and even more stories about some of her genuine favorites. Here are some of the wackier ones I get to hear about daily.
Hollister Boy
I don’t know the kid’s real name, but this is how she refers to him. He makes me wish I were 13 again so I could kick the ever-living shit out of him.
This kid, I think he’s pushing 15 in the seventh grade. Apparently, he wears Hollister clothing to school every day, and writes stuff on his desk like, “I Heart Hollister.” And he’s always talking in class about how much he loves Hollister. He wrote on his notebook, “Hollister Rules, Hot Topic Drools.” One day, he was in the hall at his locker, in a pink Hollister shirt, dancing and singing, “I’m going to Hollister this weekend/It’s my favorite store!”
My wife says he appears to be straight, but just a bit too daft to realize how gay he sounds.
Obviously, the other kids can’t stand this moron, and are always making snide comments at him. He asked my wife once if she “knew that store, Hot Topic.” She said, “Yeah,” and he said, “Do you like it?”, and she said, “Not really, but I got some shoes there once.” Then Hollister Boy gives her this grimace and turns the other way, so she goes, “It’s better than Hollister, though, that’s the worst store in the mall.”
Tate
Tate is this annoying kid, sorta semi-retarded but too annoying to feel bad for. He’s “that kid” in class who always asks the stupidest fucking questions, leading all the other kids to sigh and occasionally snap at him. For instance, my wife will go, “Does anyone have any questions related to the story we just read?” Tate will raise his hand, and she’ll repeat, “Does anyone have any questions related to the story we just read?” When he doesn’t take his hand down, she reluctantly calls on him, and he says something like, “Mrs. Logan, did you see NASCAR yesterday?” All to a big collective sigh.
A couple weeks ago the state held testing. After testing, the kids got to play softball. So the day before, my wife goes, “We’re playing softball tomorrow, so bring your gloves if you have any.” The next day, Tate shows up to the softball field with his fucking winter gloves, trying to catch fly balls in these poofy black leather insulated things, sweating his ass off in the 80 degree heat.
