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Post by Rit on May 19, 2004 18:09:55 GMT -5
don't worry about it, Samp. first of all, realize that your current position is not as uncommon as you think. and if those people everywhere are dealing with it, then so can you.
sometimes, it takes that single crystal-clear moment of self-determination to decide that there's a whole bunch of angles and sides to life that are irrelevant.. You're only here once, and you do the best you can to honour relationships and familial ties, but at some point, (as you well realize already), you have to separate yourself from that, and do what's best for you.
you're obviously floundering a bit right now, in between two or more options, taking into consideration what you once knew, and what you hope to do, and what you're perhaps being pulled to do. The trick is to determine what it is, out of all that, that you're most happiest and comfortable with. And then the hardest part comes - you have to actively leap for it.
good luck.
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slick7
Struggling Artist
Posts: 136
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Post by slick7 on May 19, 2004 19:23:32 GMT -5
i know i don't know any of you, but i was one of the regulars on the pearl jam board. i stumbled upon this board, and found it to be interesting.
luke, is your problem with multiple choice tests that you read too much into the question? i had such a rough time with my nursing boards because it was multiple choice. all the answers were right, but you had to choose the best one. i'm very analytical so i'd pick the questions apart. i hate multiple choice.
samples, best of luck to you as you're at this crossroad in your life. ultimately you have to do what is going to make you happy. you can't live your life to satisfy others. i think some people put such high expectations on us, that we'll never life up to their standard.
currently i'm reading jack kerouacs "tristessa".
i would highly recommend john irvings "a prayer for owen meany". superg suggested it to me, and it's really, really good.
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Post by luke on May 20, 2004 2:36:16 GMT -5
I really dunno what my deal is with multiple choice, slick. I don't really think I overthink them; half the time, I finish the test feeling that there's no way I missed more than a couple, that the test was really easy. Then I get the damn thing back, and I got, like, a D.
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Post by Mary on May 20, 2004 4:43:37 GMT -5
Yeah samps I'm not sure what more to say here other than to wish you luck... and to encourge you to pursue a graduate degree in philosophy if that's really what you're motivated to do. The philosophy people I know are definitely some of the most interesting people I get to interact with, and in addition to philosophy itself, they tend to be the kind of people with weird obsessions about all manner of crazy cultural shit like obscure music and film and art movements and stuff.... they're also the people who I can confess my occasionally overwhelming existential anxiety to without getting stared at like I'm crazy, horribly pretentious, or in need of therapy....
ekul (god, sorry, I know "ekul's dead" and now you're luke and all this but I can't stop thinking of you as ekul!!) I didn't know that you were considering grad school too - what for, if you know? One nice thing is that if you're applying in the humanities they won't care TOO much about your grades in the hard sciences - i.e. they'll really look at your transcript to see how you did in relevant classes. But yeah, that's not to say outright F's won't give them pause.... it's just that they'll definitely weight the humanities stuff more than the science stuff.... btw i'm not surprised you always ace your papers, you're a great writer.
as for summer reading, has anyone here ever read geek love by katherine (katharine?) dunn? it's this crazy david lynch-esque book about a travelling carnival/freak show family and their various unfathomably fucked up relationships with each other and with others. it's the kind of book where every page you turn makes you go 'holy shit did she really just write that?!' crazy stuff. that's my recommendation!
Cheers,
M
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Post by Thorngrub on May 20, 2004 9:47:00 GMT -5
Now see, samples, THAT was boring... Okay, I need some recommendations for summer reading. Quick. LUKE: The new Bruce Sterling novel is out, it's in hardcover, so it's $25, but if that's too much for you, you should take the trouble to check it out of the public library. I got some $$ for my b-day, so I splurged on it and bought myself a copy. I'm still halfway through Carl Sagan's CONTACT, but I could not resist at least reading the prologue + chap.1 of The Zenith Angle, and man I can tell this one is going to be the shiz~net. I don't know if you like science-fiction, but be advised this is not a science fiction novel. In fact, the wonderful thing about Sterling (recognized by many as THE #1 Cyberpunk Author -- I certainly place him a head & shoulder above William Gibson, for instance) is that his writing acumen has evolved to the point where he is so perceptive about current cutting edge technological advancements in computers and the internet, that he is about the only writer I know of who can get away with writing a straight-up, real-events based novel that reads like the most advanced science fiction. We're living in it; we're immersed in it up to our Adam's apples, fuck that we're swimming in an alkaline sea of processed superconducter technology and Bruce Sterling is the ideal guide to take you along for a comprehensive, eye-opening sojourn into this liquid landscape of shifting infowar & hi-tech spookerati. One of the best things about Sterling, IMO, is his uncanny ability to translate even the most advanced technical mumbo-jumbo straight into layman's terms. I.E, albeit supercharged with the most cutting edge computer development, he makes it easy for anyone to understand (well maybe not anyone). I can hardly wait to put down CONTACT (a quite enjoyable read in its own right) & start over with The Zenith Angle. Here is a boiled-down synopsis of the plot:"Derek Vandeveer is the vice president of research and development at Mondiale in Merwinster New Jersey making a fabulous salary, living in a mini mansion most people would envy and married to an astrophysicist who is his intellectual equal. Van is a very contented person, but that all changes on Sept 11, 2001 when he realizes his priorities need to change. The Federal government recruits him to work as an expert in cyber security enabling him to take an active role in the war on terrorism.
He creates Grendel, a hack-proof system that is a big success for the agency he is working for but what really interests him is the KH-13 satellite. If working properly, it can pick up images of weapons going off anywhere in the world. However, it is not working the way it is supposed to and Van thinks he has a way of firing it up even though he doesn't know the cause of the failure. Unfortunately he can't get anybody to listen to him but his time with the Feds has turned the computer nerd into a warrior, one willing to confront a traitor ready to sell out his country. " ~Taken from allreaders.com
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Post by luke on May 20, 2004 13:22:39 GMT -5
Mary, I'm probably gonna keep going for public relations. Grad program here is requiring me a 2.8 without remedial courses, BUT I might be able to get past that with my outstanding grades in all my communications courses and probably a well above average GRE bit. But we'll have to see...
BTW, I was just joking about that "ekul's dead" stuff...honestly, I forget that my user-name isn't ekul, and I wonder why everyone's calling me Luke. I was wondering if strat-o could find out what ekul's password to this site is so I could log in as him, but that would mean having to start over as "new member" guy...
Thorn, that sounds really interesting. I like to watch sci-fi, but a lot of times I have trouble reading it. Cyberpunk, on the other hand- different story. I'm familiar with Sterling, so yeah, I just might pick that up...
Although, yeah, that $25 makes a difference, especially when that new Morrissey is burning a hole in my wallet...
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Post by luke on May 20, 2004 14:18:35 GMT -5
A masters.
Not something offered in most places, but the PR department here is, like, third in the nation or something, so there's lots of opportunity.
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Post by samplestiltskin on May 20, 2004 14:44:31 GMT -5
This is awesome. A place to actually discuss and get input. I love you guys. <stifled sob> So have you taken the GRE yet ekul? Sorry to say, it is of course multiple choice except for the essay part (where I'm sure you'll get a 6 - I got a 5) but it is more about analytical thinking so I think you won't have as much trouble as those annoying undergrad MCs. Personally MC is cake to me; I get high scores even when I don't deserve it, but oh my god, slick, those nursing board questions are TERRIBLE!!! That's one reason why I just detested the nursing program. All of the answers were right, you just had to figure out what THEY would consider the "best" answer, and I'm too fucking stubborn to bend to their will, so to speak. I'd always answer what I thought was best even though I knew what I was supposed to say and of course it was always wrong. And I knew I was right. Really pissed me off. My mom emailed me today meekly hinting that I should come back to Kansas and go to this tiny school in Salina (an hour south of where they live) for legal secretary or transcriptionist. (Her words: "something more lucrative".) Oh man, I know they only want the best for me, I mean they just want me to be able to get a job, but they're just not getting it. I HATE KANSAS. I AM TRYING TO ESCAPE HER THUMB. It's sad, but even if something she said I should do was a good choice, I'd have difficulty considering it just because she wanted me to do it. Ah, to be a young retarded rebel. This is really helping me. Sort of verbalizing all the confusion and making it a little clearer. Being a philosophy professor, teaching kids who actually WANT to learn (i.e. those dedicated enough to be taking 300/400-level courses) is something I feel in my heart that I would love to do. And there are few things that feel like that. I've emailed my Aunt Sally, who has gotten her Masters if not her PhD (not sure) for advice, so that should help me decide too.... So excited to jump back into school. I never should have left, as I've been told many times before.  |
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Post by luke on May 20, 2004 17:17:55 GMT -5
Like I said, samples, MC questions on standardized tests are a breeze. It's all about application. But college professors, most of whom don't realize that real teachers actually go through an entire class on how to write tests, have those stupid, poorly formed questions that require absolutely nothing other than memorization, which I suck at.
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Post by samplestiltskin on May 20, 2004 17:42:09 GMT -5
I thought for sure college professors would have taken classes on test-writing, I just figured 80% of them got F's in those classes...
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Post by JesusLooksLikeMe on May 27, 2004 14:58:23 GMT -5
Great to see you around samps. Thorny - interesting stuff. Have you read any Neal Stephenson? I first read this guy a few years ago, and thought Snow Crash - whilst owing an obvious debt to Gibson et al - was vastly superior to other cyberpunk novels I'd read. It had the cutting edge technological vision, but also managed to pull together some seductive cod-intellectual nonsense with a real narrative pace that Gibson lacks. It was originally going to be a graphic novel, and it reads that way, but impressively so. The guy gets more impressive, although I've not read all his stuff as yet. The Diamond Age was a wonderful splicing of cutting edge nanotech with tongue-in-cheek male feminism. Lately I just read Interface, which is a book that'll delight any political theory nerd with a fondness for wet-wiring and manipulation of the electorate. The ultimate statement on the natural endgame of focus groups and TV politics. I'll never touch Gibson again. |
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Post by samplestiltskin on May 29, 2004 16:36:09 GMT -5
Great to see you around samps. ..And where exactly have you been?  New roommate has this book on Ian Curtis written by his wife. Gonna start reading it soon.
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Post by Thorngrub on May 29, 2004 16:49:18 GMT -5
[glow=yellow,2,300]Thorny - interesting stuff. Have you read any Neal Stephenson? I first read this guy a few years ago, and thought Snow Crash - whilst owing an obvious debt to Gibson et al - was vastly superior to other cyberpunk novels I'd read. It had the cutting edge technological vision, but also managed to pull together some seductive cod-intellectual nonsense with a real narrative pace that Gibson lacks.[/glow]
Hell yes, and I agree. Stephenson is a highly gifted writer, as he can translate any technological information directly into layman's terms with a lot more ease than his contemporaries. Like he's "one of us", so to speak. You should track down and read his novel ZODIAC, about a group of very realistically-depicted environmentalists who wage a sort of subversive, nonviolent guerilla-warfare against corporations who are illegally spewing pollutants into the harbor and shit. What they do is, (to take one example from the book), locate a particular pipeline that is spewing such illegal contaminants into the harbor, and then they utilize everyday hardware like tough plastic bowls and washers and drillbits and such, put on some wetsuits, take a scuba dive down there, and block up the offending pipes, effectively plugging them. Then the resulting back-up is traced back to the factory, and they alert the media as to why the factory had to shut down, and suddenly it becomes public knowledge as the media arrives to the company's front doorstep with cameras & questions. It is really good because it is set in the everyday, realtime world, based on thorough plausibility. Look it up and read it; I highly recommend it.
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Post by JesusLooksLikeMe on May 29, 2004 17:08:28 GMT -5
Great to see you around samps. ..And where exactly have you been? New roommate has this book on Ian Curtis written by his wife. Gonna start reading it soon. Ah, that'd be Touching From A Distance, by Deborah Curtis, then? I've read it, and there's two ways of looking at it. It either sullies the memory of Curtis and makes you realise he was a controlling, mentally abusive, self-absorbed twat, or it's the tale of an embittered wife who was left for a younger woman and decided to avenge herself. But it does have some interesting insights and information on both Curtis and Joy Division. I'd sooner watch 24 Hour Party People though, on balance. I'm currently reading a wonderful book called "The Smiths; Songs That Saved Your Life", by Simon Goddard. This is a gem for Smiths anoraks, with a mini-chapter on each song, explaining its genesis, any interesting anecdotes around it, and its history on TV, radio and in concert. Real nerdy stuff. dolly mistakenly thinks I'm giving it back to her once I've finished reading it. ;D |
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Post by JesusLooksLikeMe on May 29, 2004 17:11:33 GMT -5
Thorny - Zodiac is the one Stephenson I've yet to read. Sounds as essential as the rest of his catalogue, and I recommend Interface if you're leery of the future/cyberpunk stuff and enjoy a more realistic, or should I say contemporary, setting.
One Stephenson novel that has defeated me up until now is Cryptonomicon. Way too much maths, cryptology speak, and running at well over a thousand pages. I need some caffeine pills before I tackle that one again.
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