Post by kats on Jun 17, 2004 23:40:55 GMT -5
sorry. found this whilst meandering, and couldn't help myself.
12 reasons gay marriage should be illegal
1. Homosexuality is not natural, much like eyeglasses, polyester, heart
surgery, and birth control.
2. Heterosexual marriages are valid because they produce children. This is why
infertile couples and old people can't legally get married.
3. Gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise
straight children.
4. Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage is allowed.
Britney Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage was meaningful.
5. Heterosexual marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at
all; women are property, blacks can't marry whites and divorce is illegal.
6. Gay marriage should be decided by people, not the courts, because the
majority-elected legislatures, not courts, have historically protected the
rights of the minorities.
7. Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the
values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why there is
only one religion in America.
8. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging
around tall people will make you tall.
9. Legalising gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior.
People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and
can sign a marriage contract.
10. Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home.
That's why single parents are forbidden to raise children.
11. Gay marriage will change the foundation of society. We could never adapt
to new social norms because we haven't adapted to things like cars, longer
life spans or women voting.
12. Civil unions that provide most of the benefits as marriage, but with a
different name, are better because a "separate but equal" institution is
always constitutional. Separate schools for African-Americans worked just as
well as separate marriages for gays and lesbians will.
12 reasons gay marriage should be illegal
1. Homosexuality is not natural, much like eyeglasses, polyester, heart
surgery, and birth control.
2. Heterosexual marriages are valid because they produce children. This is why
infertile couples and old people can't legally get married.
3. Gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise
straight children.
4. Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage is allowed.
Britney Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage was meaningful.
5. Heterosexual marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at
all; women are property, blacks can't marry whites and divorce is illegal.
6. Gay marriage should be decided by people, not the courts, because the
majority-elected legislatures, not courts, have historically protected the
rights of the minorities.
7. Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the
values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why there is
only one religion in America.
8. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging
around tall people will make you tall.
9. Legalising gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior.
People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and
can sign a marriage contract.
10. Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home.
That's why single parents are forbidden to raise children.
11. Gay marriage will change the foundation of society. We could never adapt
to new social norms because we haven't adapted to things like cars, longer
life spans or women voting.
12. Civil unions that provide most of the benefits as marriage, but with a
different name, are better because a "separate but equal" institution is
always constitutional. Separate schools for African-Americans worked just as
well as separate marriages for gays and lesbians will.
