Skvor's House of Metal

[Thorngrub]

hey, maarts - how's about downsizing that "Heavy Metal Band Names" chart a tad -?
This page is ALLL sorts a stretched -out . . . .

[Thorngrub]

ah fuggetabout it, we're on a new page now

[Thorngrub]

So ya I'm launching a new career in promoting underground metal/thrash/grind/crust/whatever-the-fuck bands cruising through SLC on their national tours. My first show featured this sick grind band from Portland, OR called "Transient", here's how it went down.



Monday, March 23, 2009 marked my first official foray into the world of promoting underground grind shows. As you all know by now (surely), my friend Alex "Berzerker" / "the Furbinator" aka "Furby", multi-talented death metal specialist extraordinaire has been running Dark Winter Silence Productions for a few years now. As of that night, I underwent my apprenticeship in a trial by fire. I got tossed into the deep end - Alex is in Oregon for his honeymoon, and I took over his role as coordinator between the bands and the bar. My job that night was to make sure all the bands had what they needed [BEER, and plenty of it] and then it was my responsibility to collect the Door Money from the ID-checker. The ID checker gets $20 bucks out of that till. If not enough people show - say, only 3 show up and they have a total of $15 - - the bands owe the rest, out of their pockets. Anything above the teller's fee of $20 - - gets split up by the bands, and it was my responsibility to dole out the respective shares appropriately.

The touring band usually gets the lion's share - the way it went down that night was, the guy gave me $75 at the end of the night. That's 15 people not counting the bands, their guests, roadies, and the bar regulars. I brought along $20 of my own hard-earned money to "fatten the pie" - Alex told me he'd reimburse me if I did that. So that was $95 total - - Transient got $50, G.U.M. got $25, and PInk Twilight got $20. I did not pocket a dime - I even told Alex I'd pocket some for him, if he needed reimbursement, and he said Naw, he wants to make sure the bands get as much as possible, and for a Monday night, it was actually pretty amazing that many people showed up. There was well over 35 or more people in the place, all told - - I even suspect the Door Lady may have pocketed say, around $20 herself [4 people] or maybe the dude "Clint" (my go between with the boss, who bartends). But I'm not worried about it, I picked up all the nuances pretty quickly, hell I'd say my "apprenticeship" is over. I graduated with flying colors due to the following small revelations.


1. The bands - all of them, even the touring /headliners Transient, were very pleased I scored them WAY more free beer than they expected. I kept hookin em up with mad pitchers - my go between had a stash of "beer tickets", each ticket worth a pitcher. When I handed 3 tickets to Adam [sick guitarist for Transient] and told them they were each for a pitcher and when he was done with those, come to me and I'd set him up with more, he looked frankly surprised they were getting that much. I easily hooked em up with 6 pitchers that night, at least.

2. All 3 bands looked surprised to get any money - and they looked at me as if I were a small time hero when I actually forked over their respective wads of cash, at the end of the night. The local openers in G.U.M. and PInk Twilight were surprised to get paid at all. McKid's eyebrows flew up when I handed him $25. And Adam in Transient was pretty pleased to receive $50 - he totally hooked me up with both of their 7" vinyls and some stickers, so in my mind I made out like a bandit with that shit. I didn't want any money, I just had the best time coordinating all their free beer and pocket cash, and really got satisfaction from bein "the dude" who totally had their backs.

[maarts]

Cripes mate. Be careful of getting a good name in those circles- you may end up constantly promising shitloads of beer to those guests!
But being a tour manager is a bit like being a headless chook, innit?

Anyhow, great story. Was the music awright?

[Thorngrub]

Ya, of course I've been around the scene long enough to know - the promoter's work is a thankless job. Not something I'd necessarily want to willingly get myself tied down with, ya know? At the same time, I have a passion for this scene [underground metal] and for one, know everyone in my local scene, and 2ndly, my persona on myspace has its own limited networking that is increasingly reaching more and more bands. I even shaved my head again 'cept for a forelock, so I resemble exactly my myspace image, right now. I'm developing a sort of recognizable "cult of personality", ya see. Eventually I want the bands who I've hooked up via myspace to recognize me instantly when they arrive here. "There's Thornswrath!" Ultimately, I don't want any money out of this - its just something for me to "do" while I'm at a show, so I can make myself useful. I've had too many damned good times over the last 8 years here getting to know the local metal scene, and it occured to me recently that, damn - - if my friend Alex (who is now married with 1 bun in the oven) ends up giving his promoting days up -- WTF is gunna happen to the local metal shows he used to set up all the fuckin' time? It occurred to me that I could be that guy - who knows--?-- maybe I was born to do this.

So I agreed to cover that one Transient show a couple Mondays ago, while he was on his honeymoon. It went over great. I had the best time.

And the music was awesome that night - from all 3 bands. Pink Twilight was described by sisy as "New Order meets deathmetal", and I told the guys that and they loved it. Its a pretty apt description - - they're like, electro- death lounge, or something. They featured charming death-vocal songs like "Bukkake Party" and generally entertained the fuck out of us. Then G.U.M. ["Give Us Money"] played, and they really sounded like TOOL - - but in a good way. For one, no vocals. [That would really have ruined them, reducing them to nothing but a cheap tool wannabe band, a dime a dozen these days.] But instead, G.U.M. came across more like if Tool were a post-rock outfit; they noodled and jammed on extended improvised sessions that were really wicked. The crowd dug em a lot. Me and my pal Darin agreed they were "better than tool" (and we were serious -in a way).

But TRANSIENT fuckin' showed everyone in the place "how its done". Neck snapping speed death grind whiplash music, one minute songs that came at us as if fired from a machine gun. Very impressive, and I hope to see them again sometime soon.

[wayved8]

Me-TALLLLL! Glad you had a good time.